Nike SB Dunk High Premium Waffle

Now that Winter is on the decline and soon to be replaced by Spring and, eventually, Summer, Nike SB goes straight for your taste buds with probably the most sugary Dunk every conceived. Aptly dubbed “the Waffle,” this highly limited Dunk High explores how insane the world would be like if everything looked like food. Remember when cartoon characters like Wile E. Coyote got hungry? People and everyday objects would turn into comestibles, say, into chicken wings or hot dogs, illustrating the character’s dire need for food as he slowly gave in to starvation-induced insanity. It’s like Nike’s designers skipped breakfast and subconsciously came up with this hyper-real design. Or they just like waffles really, really much.

Sadly, however, the shoe is not made out of dough and maple syrup. Its upper is made of hemp and embossed to look like a waffle, while the sole is made from translucent rubber. The Swoosh is also transparent and features a print that resembles dripping maple syrup. If you’re like us, just looking at the shoe will make you hungry.  This, of course, messes with our plans to get ripped for beach season. Well, it’s not like the pounds gained over Winter were going to go anywhere, right? Great job, Nike. Now we can wear Dunks corresponding to our ever increasing waistline. Disclaimer for fatties: This shoe ain’t edible. Sorry ‘bout that.

Pro tip: wear it to the next gathering of Weight Watchers for maximum hilarity.

The Nike SB Dunk High Premium "Waffle" will be available from April 2nd.